Wednesday, September 9, 2009

yes is yes and no is no

Barney stayed home all yesterday to nurse a cold that he picked up when he had a bath instead of going to sleep. The boy has boundless energy even with a cold, running, then reading, climbing, then building, playing with his many trucks; and he demands company all the time. For a mother who needs time for herself to recover, it was exhausting. The good that did come out was Barney's ability to repeat the alphabet from A to Z and count from 1 to 10 and the new word "chop" goes with the new chop that prints good with a smiling teddy. So i sent him to school today, starving off his cries by singing his favourite nursery songs. With a betrayed frown, he insisted on bringing his 2 chinese books to school.

So often we have to bite the bullet, make a decision and take steps to follow through to grow. Yes Barney needs other people to interact with, yes he needs to let go of his Mammy, yes i need some time to do my own reflection to make sense of things, yes school is the answer but why does it make my tummy knot up and i sigh..i guess the truth is i wish i could be all things for this little tike, but i have to admit i can't, and i just have to trust that others will help me care for him.

The learning process seems to take forever.

I do get encouraged when i see people grow. This morning my friend has reported she has learnt to swim:)
I see another doing well with her young ones:) Time for me to learn to be a leader; according to a freind you have to learn to be all things at all times. It must be the hardest thing to do but i will try.

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